News Haiku: Issue 3, by Garth Ball

Here at The Lion’s Roar, we know you’re much too busy to pay much attention to the news. Either that, or you’re too lazy. Maybe both; it’s a thin line. In any case, here’s the quick-and-dirty version of the major U.S. and world news from the past academic quarter. In haiku form.

 

State of the Union

I am watching as I type

They used a hashtag

 

Ukraine in revolt!

Hate president, want EU

Fires are kinda cool though

 

*Update*

Cold War 2.0

We rushin’ to conclusions?

Media thinks not

(Shut up you know you love puns)

 

SEAHAWKS SUPERBOWL

I feel unqualified here

But I will update

 

*Update*

Victory at last!

Glory for every 12th Man!

I still see the flags

 

It’s awaaaaaaaards season!

See if your favorite won!

Wait, who votes for them…?

 

Schools, malls, needless deaths

Movie theatres, shootings

We need solutions

 

Malaysia Airlines

It’s the new season of Lost:

No clue what’s happ’nin

 

Venezuela, man.

Inflation, protests, police

¿Revolución?